I need a haircut again, but it's going to be a long while before I get one. I don't enjoy it on a number of levels. First, it seems like a tedious way to spend any amount of time, just sitting there and making awkward conversation with some random person who's under the impression that I want to have a conversation, when what I really want is to close my eyes, take a nap, and wake up with the whole thing done.
When you sit down, they ask how you want it cut. Now, this is an obvious question for them to ask, but it ALWAYS catches me off-guard. I feel like I've done enough just making the time and showing up, and now I suddenly need a plan and a vision. I don't know! Just trim it or something. Since I work in an office, I'd like it cut so short I don't have to do anything with it in the morning. My wife wants it longer than that, so this leaves me at a loss. I usually end up trusting the judgment of some random hair-cutting person: "Just do whatever you think is best. You probably know better than I do."
If I didn't have the day job, I'd almost never get my hair cut, because the experience is so annoying to me. When I'm off work--for example, when I just took two months of leave for the birth of my son--I pretty much revert to my college hippie look in about a week. My beard grows really fast. Did you ever see that Discovery Channel documentary where they show how rapidly the wilderness would overtake the cities if humans disappeared? That's what happens with my face when I'm not going to a day job. The wilderness is always waiting just below the surface.
Now, my wife has me go to the salon in the same strip mall as her pet supply store, and so my ears get waxed, too. I sort of don't have a choice, the ladies at the salon sort of insist on it. And here's the weird part: I don't really mind it. It's kind of a ripping, tearing pain, but it feels like progress. It's not the extended snip-snip tedium of watching someone trim your hair for thirty minutes while they tell you about their boyfriend/kids/dog. So maybe I should just get my whole head waxed and be done with it.